Seasons

I live in an area with four seasons and I love every bit of it.  I might enjoy the perfect temperatures of Southern California, but I would miss the diversity of seasons, not to mention the opportunity to wear different types of clothing.

During my oldest daughter's first days, I woke up repeatedly to feed her then I zombie walked through the day. I would remind myself that this was only for a season.  For a short amount of time, I can lose sleep knowing that there will be a day when she will sleep through the night.  I am familiar with that feeling of moving your feet when they have turned into bricks.

After 4 weeks of short naps, I had an opportunity to get together with other adults.  It was my turn to introduce myself to the group.  It took everything I had to remember my name.  Two weeks later she slept a solid 6 hours.  It wasn't long after that it turned to 8 hours. I made it through that season.

I could look back and remember.  I could look back and see that the season didn't make me weaker.  It was tough, but it ended.

All life is filled with seasons.  Some are short, some are long, and some seem to never end. Just like this winter season we are experiencing now, eventually the snow will melt and the flowers will bloom again.  It doesn't matter that the foot-deep snow is not melting now, I know it will.

I'm experiencing a tough season right now.  I enjoy my job, but it strips me of my energy by midweek.  I don't know if I'm exhausted because of my job or if my exhaustion is because I have a full time job, am trying to complete my master's degree, and do mom and wife things.  I'm wondering if I need to find a job that doesn't make me want to go to bed at 6:30.

I know this is a season.  I know that there will be a day when I find a schedule that doesn't tax me and steal away the energy that I might have spent enjoying my family instead of watching Netflix, waiting until the appropriate time to go to bed.  I take one step at a time, one day at time and know that my faithfulness will eventually bring me to the next season, not unlike shoveling the walk each time it snows will pass and the weeds and flowers will take their place.

I look forward to the next season.  I know I will survive this one.  I know it won't break me and might even make me stronger.