We will be remembered for how we treated people, how we spoke to them, how we cared about them, how we encouraged them, and how we loved them. Our actions and accomplishments aren't as everlasting as our character.
I spent a couple days listening to the achievements of some great people during an awards ceremony. The slide shows celebrated their diligence, their willingness to make a difference in the lives around them, their willingness to give of their time and themselves. We celebrated their steadfastness, work ethic and humbleness. Their achievements were amazing, but it was their character in the midst of these achievements that everyone was honoring.
Are you most proud of your character in the day to day, in the midst of difficult times or times when life takes a little more effort? Or are you most proud of the list of achievements you can put on your resume?
Are you thankful for a day where you positively impacted people, encouraged them and helped them meet their goals? Or are you more thankful that you met your goals?
Achievements are wonderful and they often drive us to move forward, but they aren't everything and they shouldn't keep us from having the kind of character that moves people, encourages people and gives people hope that they can overcome the difficulties, challenges and obstacles in life. The people around you will believe in themselves because of you.
This doesn't happen through work. This happens through living and loving and being your best even if your best doesn't feel all that great.
How do you want to be remembered?
Tuesday, October 31, 2017
Sunday, October 29, 2017
Orange Story: Daily Reminder
About a week after the infusions I began taking MS medication. I talked with my doctor about which one would work best for me. The directions for my medication made it very clear that it needed to be taken at the same time everyday, twice a day. The more consistently it was in my body the better chance it had to be successful.
MS medication doesn't make a person better. Its job is to reduce the attacks. My immune system is attacking the protective covering over my nerve cells. The medication reduces the amount of white blood cells that I have. By reducing the white blood cells, we essentially reduce the size of the army that is attacking my nerve cells. The medication can't take away or fix damage. The hope is that it keeps away future damage. Imagine a battle where the soldiers are attacking an unarmed castle. The only hope the people in the castle have is that the soldiers will stop. If there are fewer of them, the damage won't be as bad and maybe they can creatively keep them away.
Taking medication the same time twice a day meant that I had to set an alarm. There are two alarms on my phone that go off every day reminding me to take my medication. I've been taking my medication for over 2 years. At the very beginning, the alarm was a daily reminder that this new thing was part of me. I couldn't escape it or forget about it because the alarm would ding and remind me once again. I wondered if I would get used to it. Today it's better. It isn't such a glaring reminder today, just a quiet reality.
There is always a daily reminder of our weaknesses and short comings. It comes in the form of an alarm for me. Sometimes it's a nagging pain, sometimes it's a visible change, sometimes it's a memory. How do we deal with those reminders? Do we graciously accept that our weaknesses are not who we are or do we cringe and feel less than what we should?
I hope we remember that our weaknesses and difficulties and short comings are not our identity. They simple are the things we overcome and grow in, making us amazing despite the difficulties trying to pull us down.
MS medication doesn't make a person better. Its job is to reduce the attacks. My immune system is attacking the protective covering over my nerve cells. The medication reduces the amount of white blood cells that I have. By reducing the white blood cells, we essentially reduce the size of the army that is attacking my nerve cells. The medication can't take away or fix damage. The hope is that it keeps away future damage. Imagine a battle where the soldiers are attacking an unarmed castle. The only hope the people in the castle have is that the soldiers will stop. If there are fewer of them, the damage won't be as bad and maybe they can creatively keep them away.
Taking medication the same time twice a day meant that I had to set an alarm. There are two alarms on my phone that go off every day reminding me to take my medication. I've been taking my medication for over 2 years. At the very beginning, the alarm was a daily reminder that this new thing was part of me. I couldn't escape it or forget about it because the alarm would ding and remind me once again. I wondered if I would get used to it. Today it's better. It isn't such a glaring reminder today, just a quiet reality.
There is always a daily reminder of our weaknesses and short comings. It comes in the form of an alarm for me. Sometimes it's a nagging pain, sometimes it's a visible change, sometimes it's a memory. How do we deal with those reminders? Do we graciously accept that our weaknesses are not who we are or do we cringe and feel less than what we should?
I hope we remember that our weaknesses and difficulties and short comings are not our identity. They simple are the things we overcome and grow in, making us amazing despite the difficulties trying to pull us down.
Friday, October 27, 2017
I Can
It's not about what you can't do. It's about what you can.
It's not about your limitations. It's about your achievements.
I don't want people to say she did well considering all her obstacles, I want them to say she did well and on top of that, look at what she overcame.
There may always be a list of what I cannot do, but I want to celebrate the list of things I can do,
I can walk, talk, listen, write and read. I can do my job, take care of my family, and enjoy my friends. I can make a difference in other's lives. I can love. I can care. I can show up.
The list of things I can do is much longer than the things I cannot do. I choose to celebrate and remember what I am still capable of and when something I can do becomes a cannot, I will still celebrate all the cans that remain.
I will celebrate my achievements and not focus on my limitations. I can.
It's not about your limitations. It's about your achievements.
I don't want people to say she did well considering all her obstacles, I want them to say she did well and on top of that, look at what she overcame.
There may always be a list of what I cannot do, but I want to celebrate the list of things I can do,
I can walk, talk, listen, write and read. I can do my job, take care of my family, and enjoy my friends. I can make a difference in other's lives. I can love. I can care. I can show up.
The list of things I can do is much longer than the things I cannot do. I choose to celebrate and remember what I am still capable of and when something I can do becomes a cannot, I will still celebrate all the cans that remain.
I will celebrate my achievements and not focus on my limitations. I can.
Wednesday, October 25, 2017
Orange Story: Listen to the Answer
When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I chose not to share things with other people because I didn't think they wanted to hear or I didn't think they would understand. I would answer questions simply are rarely offer extra information.
My conversations with people about MS were more frustrating. Most people aren't educated about what MS does. I wouldn't have known anything if I hadn't done research when my dad was diagnosed.
I was becoming less gracious with people's statements to me. I know they cared and didn't know what to say. I think I was frustrated because they didn't listen, not because they didn't know what to say.
I would explain that I would begin medication soon. I explained that the medication's purpose was to keep away new episodes like the one I had. It doesn't make me better. The most common response was, "You'll feel better when you get your medication." I had to stop talking. They didn't hear me. They didn't listen to what I was sharing. They asked, but didn't listen.
My heart would sink every time. I had to stop talking. I just wanted them to hear my answer to their question. I wanted to have the conversation they started.
I've accepted these things, but I hope that we can stop and hear those around us. If we don't understand, ask a few more questions and listen to the answer. Let that person know that you value their story enough to hear it.
My conversations with people about MS were more frustrating. Most people aren't educated about what MS does. I wouldn't have known anything if I hadn't done research when my dad was diagnosed.
I was becoming less gracious with people's statements to me. I know they cared and didn't know what to say. I think I was frustrated because they didn't listen, not because they didn't know what to say.
I would explain that I would begin medication soon. I explained that the medication's purpose was to keep away new episodes like the one I had. It doesn't make me better. The most common response was, "You'll feel better when you get your medication." I had to stop talking. They didn't hear me. They didn't listen to what I was sharing. They asked, but didn't listen.
My heart would sink every time. I had to stop talking. I just wanted them to hear my answer to their question. I wanted to have the conversation they started.
I've accepted these things, but I hope that we can stop and hear those around us. If we don't understand, ask a few more questions and listen to the answer. Let that person know that you value their story enough to hear it.
Tuesday, October 24, 2017
Giving Christmas
This might seem a bit early, but as we near the end of October and the stores begin to put out their Christmas things, I remember a Christmas that was simple and beautiful.
Christmas 2012 was an extra giving Christmas. My oldest daughter was 11 and my youngest daughter was 8. That year, my girls were more excited to watch people open gifts they had given than to open their own gifts. They took the time to find special things for people that they knew they would love. They saved their own money and did their own shopping.
Everyone was thoughtful this year and tried to give people things that fit them or they talked about. The key to good gift giving is listening to the person you are getting a gift for. You have to listen to them all year not just in December. You have to listen to what they like, what they need, what they would love to have but will never buy for themselves. You have to listen to what is important to them.
It's my favorite when you happen upon that perfect gift that you know someone will love rather than hunting it down in a busy afternoon. Those special gifts are the ones you are anxious for someone else to open. No one gave gifts just to have something to wrap that year.
It felt like a very blessed Christmas. Blessed because of people, health and love, not because anything under the tree.
I hope that as we enter into this coming season that everyone will remember that it is about people and not things. It is about thinking of others and not good deals.
Christmas 2012 was an extra giving Christmas. My oldest daughter was 11 and my youngest daughter was 8. That year, my girls were more excited to watch people open gifts they had given than to open their own gifts. They took the time to find special things for people that they knew they would love. They saved their own money and did their own shopping.
Everyone was thoughtful this year and tried to give people things that fit them or they talked about. The key to good gift giving is listening to the person you are getting a gift for. You have to listen to them all year not just in December. You have to listen to what they like, what they need, what they would love to have but will never buy for themselves. You have to listen to what is important to them.
It's my favorite when you happen upon that perfect gift that you know someone will love rather than hunting it down in a busy afternoon. Those special gifts are the ones you are anxious for someone else to open. No one gave gifts just to have something to wrap that year.
It felt like a very blessed Christmas. Blessed because of people, health and love, not because anything under the tree.
I hope that as we enter into this coming season that everyone will remember that it is about people and not things. It is about thinking of others and not good deals.
Monday, October 23, 2017
Orange Story: Right Now
Once my infusions were complete, I had a couple of days to be home and to rest. I managed to do a few household tasks and walk in the sun. I enjoyed the sunshine on my face. I felt like a flower soaking up the rays.
I continued to feel nauseous those few days. My nauseousness would come and go throughout the day. Even though I was no longer receiving infusions, I think the medicine was still making its way through me. My arm was refusing to wake up. It felt like it hung limp at my side. My collar bone and overall left side felt bruised to the touch. I slept for over 10 hours and it didn't seem to make a dent in my problems.
In order for me to keep from going crazy or getting depressed I had to be in the moment.
In the moment, I had lost some use of my muscles on the left side of my body. I didn't feel well and was tired. Also, in the moment there was hope that I would get better.
MS was not going to go away, but these symptoms may so I hoped and used that hope to stave off depression. I know that when I have mobility back I will use it and be thankful for it. Until then, I will hope and be patient and see and be thankful for what is right now.
I continued to feel nauseous those few days. My nauseousness would come and go throughout the day. Even though I was no longer receiving infusions, I think the medicine was still making its way through me. My arm was refusing to wake up. It felt like it hung limp at my side. My collar bone and overall left side felt bruised to the touch. I slept for over 10 hours and it didn't seem to make a dent in my problems.
In order for me to keep from going crazy or getting depressed I had to be in the moment.
In the moment, I had lost some use of my muscles on the left side of my body. I didn't feel well and was tired. Also, in the moment there was hope that I would get better.
MS was not going to go away, but these symptoms may so I hoped and used that hope to stave off depression. I know that when I have mobility back I will use it and be thankful for it. Until then, I will hope and be patient and see and be thankful for what is right now.
Sunday, October 22, 2017
On the Horizon
Today I was able to see the mountains clearly. There was no haze or clouds to block my view. They were majestic. The blues and purples topped with patches of snow stood out against the grey sky. As I looked at those mountains, I remembered our trip to the Oregon Coast not long ago.
Our journey to the coast takes us through Eastern Oregon then along the Columbia River. We have traveled over the mountains that sit in northeast Oregon more than 20 times. On this journey I spotted two mountains on the horizon I had never seen before. I believe I was seeing Mt. Adams and Mt. Rainier. Looking at the map, I was in awe at how far away these mountains were and I was able to see them from my vantage point atop the Blues Mountains.
Those mountains have always there. I've never seen them before because they were hidden behind haze that usually sits on the horizon.
Many amazing and beautiful and magnificent things are on the horizon all the time. They are hidden by haze. They are hidden by the clouds. They are hidden by bad weather. Now that I know those mountains are there, I will always look for them. My eyes will be searching for any hint of them next time we travel that way.
Perhaps there is always something amazing and beautiful on the horizon. Perhaps it is simply hidden. I want to look expectantly for what might be hidden. I want to remember to expect the amazing. It may take awhile for it to appear, but I know it is there. I know the magnificent is waiting for me.
Our journey to the coast takes us through Eastern Oregon then along the Columbia River. We have traveled over the mountains that sit in northeast Oregon more than 20 times. On this journey I spotted two mountains on the horizon I had never seen before. I believe I was seeing Mt. Adams and Mt. Rainier. Looking at the map, I was in awe at how far away these mountains were and I was able to see them from my vantage point atop the Blues Mountains.
Those mountains have always there. I've never seen them before because they were hidden behind haze that usually sits on the horizon.
Many amazing and beautiful and magnificent things are on the horizon all the time. They are hidden by haze. They are hidden by the clouds. They are hidden by bad weather. Now that I know those mountains are there, I will always look for them. My eyes will be searching for any hint of them next time we travel that way.
Perhaps there is always something amazing and beautiful on the horizon. Perhaps it is simply hidden. I want to look expectantly for what might be hidden. I want to remember to expect the amazing. It may take awhile for it to appear, but I know it is there. I know the magnificent is waiting for me.
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