Punches and Slugs

What do you do when you fall?

Do you roll around on the ground hoping someone will see you before you finally get up?
Do you hop up like a spring hoping no one will notice you fell?
Do you get up, dust yourself off, figure out why you fell and learn from it?

Even though I've done all three, I hope I have done the last one the most.

Sometimes we like to be noticed.  Sometimes we want others to notice our pain or our fall.  We want to hear their sympathy.  The best example of this is portrayed by young children.  They fall and even if they aren't hurt, they want you to know.  They want you to come running, they want you to hear their cries.  They want to be consoled.  We all have these moments.  We all have moments when we want someone to notice we are on the ground.  We want someone to notice we are hurt.  We aren't too eager to bounce back, the compassion feels nice.

Sometimes we don't want anyone to see us.  We made a mistake, we did something we shouldn't have, we forgot our age for a moment and we fell.  We are embarrassed and are turning red.  We jump up from our landing place regardless of whether we are bleeding or not, look around to see who saw us then pretend nothing happened.  The last thing we want is to be noticed.

Sometimes falls take us by surprise.  We find ourselves down, we are hurt but we didn't do anything to cause the fall, it just happened.  We check our surroundings, we cautiously get back up.  We see what caused the fall and are prepared to watch for it in the future hoping to avoid it if it comes around again.  These falls are often caused by outside sources.  We were paying attention, we weren't looking for attention, we just went down.

I've fallen or been knocked down so many times.  Whichever way I keep getting up, I keep getting up.  It doesn't do any good to stay on the ground.  It doesn't do any good to cry.  It doesn't do any good to sit and wait to be noticed.  The only thing that works for me is to get back up. I hope I learn from the fall.  Sometimes I learn, sometimes it takes many more falls to learn.

Cancer is the equivalent of a punch in the face.  It feels like you are walking down the sidewalk, minding your own business when a stranger punches you in the face and keeps walking.  You didn't do anything to deserve it.  It takes you completely by surprise and there is very little you can do to fix it.  There will never be an answer to why, the stranger has disappeared.  Cancer tried to knock me down.  Each morning I would get back up.  During the day, the weight would get heavy, I would stop trying to carry it and get back up over and over and over.  Today, I still bear the scars of cancer.  I still have daily pain from the treatment.  I don't get to forget the slug to my face, but I also won't forget the strength I discovered.  Because of that slug to my face, If you have cancer, I understand.  I understand if you are sick.  I've been there and I am happy to sit with you whether you are still down or have found the strength to get back up.

At the moment when cancer seemed to be behind me and I was ready to get strong and healthy again, I got another punch.  This time it was to my gut.  I went to bed perfectly healthy and woke up with MS symptoms.  I tried to jump up from this one.  I tried to act like it was no big deal.  The trip to the doctor quickly woke me up.  This was another stranger punching me in the stomach then running off.  I didn't do anything to get MS and I wouldn't be able to make it go away.  The MS roller coaster was more difficult physically than I had expected.  That slug to the stomach did more damage than at first glance.  I was forced to change my diet in order to keep the pain away.  I was forced to change my schedule in order to maintain my energy.  Today, after 3 years, MS doesn't control me the way it did in the beginning, but it left a mark.  My life will always be a bit different and that stranger who slugged me is part of a gang, any one of them could be back at any time to try to take something else.  I can choose to constantly be looking over my shoulder or I can get up and keep walking.

I know you and I get knocked down by something everyday.  Sometimes it is big like MS and cancer, but most of the time it is little like that mean comment or that exhausting schedule.  How do you get back up?  Do you get back up?  How do you shake off the dust and bruises and keep walking?  What pushes you to rise above the pain?  What gives you strength to keep moving?

I hope there are great answers to these questions.  I hope you have faith and friends and fortitude, but above all I hope you find a way to get back up.  Look back at the last time you were knocked down.  Look at what you have done since then.  You are strong and none of these punches to the face and slugs to the gut are going to take you out.