I was thrilled last week when I was able to begin physical therapy. Pre-sciatic nerve/leg pain/surgery I was very active. I had the ability to run, row, ride a bike, lift heavy weights, perform Olympic lifts, and combine those things together. I was able to squat, lunge, and jump. I could do a handstand by a wall, climb a short rope and I could almost do a pull up.
The sciatic nerve pain 2 months ago removed all my ability to move. Surgery helped me regain me the ability to move again, but I had to start all over. First, the doctors gave me permission to walk. I took that very seriously. I walked as far as I could, striving to go farther and faster everyday. I walked a few short walks. My first mile took me almost 30 minutes. I kept track of my distance and speed and consciously worked to go farther or faster. Now I can walk a mile in 20 minutes.
The moment I was given permission to ride a bike. I got on it. I rode a little farther every time. Once I had the ability to ride for an extended period of time, I started going faster. I pushed myself to go take the second mile faster than the first.
Physical therapy began. Everything the Physical Therapist tells me to do I do. He suggests I do the exercises 1-2 times a day. I do them 2 times. I don't do them 3 times because over work can be as detrimental as not doing enough. I want to be able to function the way I used to again. I don't want any limitations. The only way I know to get to that place is to work hard everyday, to be diligent and to be faithful with the small things I can do. If I am faithful I can gain all my strength and mobility back. I will probably move better than before when this is finished because I will be certain that I move correctly so I don't injure myself.
There are people out there who have the physical ability to walk, yet they are unhealthy. They choose not to walk. They choose to remain unhealthy even though they have the muscles and mobility to move their legs. I didn't have that ability. I couldn't walk without pain causing tears. This pain came under the influence of prescription drugs. I can't imagine the pain without the numbing assistance of those pain killers.
Please be thankful for what you can do and don't take it for granted. The ability to move is precious. The ability to function throughout a day without needing to ask for assistance to pick up a fork you dropped or have someone tie your shoes for you is more valuable than gems. One day I tried to throw something away. I missed the trash can and ended up staring at the trash. First, I told myself not to pick it up. Then I realized it would have to stay on the floor until someone came around to pick it up for me. Imagine the frustration as you stand and stare at a tiny piece of paper that you would normally pick up and throw away. You are forced to leave it in it's place not because you are in a hurry, but because you physically can't bend down to get it.
I experienced this loss. I had my ability to move taken away. Now I must work to get all of it back. I am okay with this. I am okay with work. I know that I will have the ability to move again. I know I will be stronger, more flexible and healthier than I was before. I knew in the midst of the pain that none of what I was going through would last forever. Not everyone has to go through a great loss to appreciate what they have. Not everyone has to feel pain to appreciate a day without it.
No one knows what tomorrow brings. Enjoy, celebrate, appreciate the gifts of today. They are not promised tomorrow.
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