On October 25th I had my first cancer dream, that’s pretty incredible considering this had been on my mind for over a month. I was standing in line at the grocery store and a lady bought my groceries for me. They cost $138. (Why that number? I don’t know.) Somebody in my dream was talking about all the faults and messiness that come with the surgery. They were relaying the horror stories. I don’t know where any of it came from, I hadn't had any of those thoughts while I was awake. I woke up feeling miserable.
October 26, 2012 (journal entry)
I wrote: Can I really do this? Can I really be strong enough to endure surgery, radiation, be a wife and mother, a friend and successful teacher?
I heard: “You can’t, but in Me you can.”
The initial stress of all this turned my cold into pneumonia. Once the pneumonia began to subside I acquired 3 cold sores. (I always get cold sores during stressful times.) On the outside I am calm, but this stress is obviously affecting me and my body refuses to conceal it.
No comments:
Post a Comment